Satisfyer Pro 2
If you’ve read any of my previous articles, you’ll know that I spent a LOT of time playing with and enjoying the Womanizer Pro, but I had the itch to see what else was out there. I had stumbled into a whole new category of toys that I didn’t even realize existed before this. The Satisfyer Pro 2 caught my attention because it looks like it does exactly what a Womanizer does for half the price! If you’re not sure what the hell I’m talking about, holy shit you’re in for a treat today!
Basically this little toy is a battery operated clitoris stimulator. A little clit sucker. You put the white silicone tip on to your fun button and it seems to softly suckle you by using pulsing air without ever touching your clitoris directly. I’ve written before about how my own clit was just spiraling down into a bottomless pit of more and more vibration and less and less sensation. The fix for my poor little nub was LESS direct stimulation. The Womanizer worked perfectly for this and I was about to find out that the Satisfyer brings a whole new experience to the table.
This type of toy is absolutely for you if you’ve been feeling like your clitoris isn’t as sensitive as it used to be or if you feel like you can’t seem to reach orgasm with just clitoral stimulation.
The Original Satisfyer
The original Satisfyer Pro 2 had many reviewers stumped. It was a good product that seemed to work exactly like the Womanizer, but there were some serious usability flaws that users simply couldn’t ignore. The first one was the intensity. With 11 different intensities, one would think that it would start out with very gentle suction and then work up to “golf ball through a garden hose” intensity. Nuh uh. The original Satisfyer Pro 2 started at “overenthusiastic college girl” and topped out at “Possessed Shop Vac.” Most clits just couldn’t handle the intensity at all, making the product completely unusable. The other issue that the original version had was the noise! We’re talking noise that your neighbors can hear across the street. It was freaking loud!
Coincidentally, Satisfyer did some tinkering and came out with a new and improved version, and to the abject confusion of absolutely everyone, also named it the “Satisfyer Pro 2.”
The Drama with Womanizer
What happened was interesting: fans of the product were ecstatic! This company really seemed to listen to what their customers had to say. The truth, however, is more complex than that. Satisfyer was slapped with a patent suit by Womanizer and an out of court settlement was reached. Basically, Womanizer claimed that Satisfyer had copied their product. Satisfyer claimed that this was a marketing ploy to create uncertainty about their product but, then again, it sounds like Satisfyer coughed up a few bucks in a settlement to make this all go away. Now this was the first model of Satisfyer that Womanizer made the claim against.
The question is. Did Satisfyer make their changes to the Pro 2 to please their users or to avoid lawsuits because their original model was a rip off Womanizer? Who know? Does anyone really care? Most of us just want to cum.
The good news is that more of us CAN cum now with the new Satisfyer Pro 2. They dialed down the intensity big time and made it almost whisper quiet. This product is now poised to overtake the behemoth Womanizer in the market for machines that suck clits.
The Satisfyer Pro 2 – Current Version
How cumbersome to always have to refer to pre- and post- transformation Satisfyers. Let’s just say that we aren’t going to talk at all about the Satisfyer Pro 2’s teenage years and we’ll be referring to the current version only from here on in.
Let’s just get this part out of the way. If you like having orgasms, you’ll like the Satisfyer Pro 2. Plain and simple. This toy will make almost every woman have a fast, hard, and hot orgasm. Do we need to talk more about the toy after realizing this fact? Well yes, because competition is stiff and the decisions rest in the details.
The Ins and Outs
The device itself is pretty sleek and nice looking. It doesn’t explicitly look like a sex toy, but it doesn’t look so much like a household appliance that you’ll be distracted wondering why you have an ear thermometer sucking on your clit. The silicone head feels soft and comfortable on your clitoris and feels good whether or not I use lubrication (remember, water based lube only with this silicone toy). The Satisfyer Pro 2 doesn’t come with extra heads and they currently only make one size. I’m honestly not sure how to size my clitoris but I think that the head they provide is fairly (?) big. I have no idea what it would feel like if it was too small but I imagine that I wouldn’t be able to cum very easily if it didn’t fit.
The rose gold case is smooth ABS plastic and fits comfortably in my hand. There are two buttons: an on/off button that has a light indicator beside it to let you know it’s turned on, and an intensity button. As mentioned before, there are 11 intensities. These aren’t patterns or rhythms, but actually the suction starts gentle and gets stronger eleven times. I think this is overkill for me BUT clits are extremely sensitive and discerning entities and I don’t think that the ol’ “high, medium, and low” would allow everyone to find their perfect setting.
What would really benefit this toy would be an up and down button for adjusting the intensity. Currently, if you are at level 3 and you want to go down to level 2, you have to push the button to go all the way up to level 11 and then back down to level 2. Um. This can be super mood breaking and too much stimulation! With practice, however, you’ll learn what setting you like best and use that the majority of the time.
Lastly, the new whisper quiet feature of this toy is just that! Whisper quiet! Amazingly, it gets even more quiet when it’s attached to your lady bits! While I wouldn’t use this sitting beside my mother in the car, I’d take it into a movie theater or use it while on the phone with my cable company.
Waterproof? Oh Thank God!
Of course, one of the major features of the Satisfyer Pro 2 is the fact that it is waterproof. Bath time experiences aside, I love a waterproof toy because of the ease of cleaning. I’m fairly sure that everyone hates seeing “wipe with damp cloth” instructions. I feel like no damp cloth is ever going to get a sex toy particularly clean. The silicone head also comes off. This is not only important for cleaning but it means that the head can be replaced if it gets damaged or lost AND you can lend your best friend your Satisfyer without feeling disgusting.
The waterproof is crucial for me. I generally don’t buy toys that aren’t bath friendly unless it’s something super specialized like the Hitachi Magic Wand. There’s something so relaxing about warm water and a steamy bathroom that just makes it feel so much better. But that’s me.
Sadly, we don’t have a bathtub in Central America where we’re living temporarily. We do however have a beautiful jacuzzi overlooking the jungle, which has been the scene of many, many erotic evenings! I got a chance to get down to business one evening in the hot tub. The sensation of the Satisfyer under water is great! It’s not really THAT different from normal use, but the option to diddle myself in the bath or shower with this toy makes me much more likely to reach for it over the Womanizer W500.
Charge me up!
Just like many other waterproof toys, the Satisfyer Pro 2 has a magnetic USB charger. You just touch the leads to the unit and it sticks and charges. I like this feature and I really like that the indicator light flashes when it’s charging so you know for sure that the leads are attached.
Speaking of charging, 2.5 hours of charge time gets you 30 minutes of play. When I first read this, I was shocked! I thought to myself “Aha! This is what you’re sacrificing when buying a less expensive toy.” But, then I thought about it for a little longer. When the hell are you going to need this toy turned on for longer than 30 minutes? Seriously, it takes 3 minutes maximum to have an orgasm and even multiples will bring you well in under that 30 minute mark. Also, I’m fairly certain that the 30 minutes is for full intensity power; the Satisfyer should last longer than half an hour on the lower settings.
Satisfyer Pro 2 Conclusions
Overall, the Satisfyer Pro 2 is an extremely good buy. It gently (or not-so-gently) provides suction on your clitoris in such a natural and unobtrusive way that you can’t help but to have an orgasm. Every time. I like how it looks and how it feels in my hand. My clitoris likes the soft silicone head that does the dirty work. I love the fact that it is waterproof. I was slightly put off by the strangeness of having to increase to max intensity if I wanted to go from a 4, for example, to a 3 and I mentioned how this could easily be fixed by Satisfyer in upcoming models. Satisfyer could have thrown us a bone and tossed in one extra silicone head, but I can’t complain too much about extras that we’re not getting at the price point they’re selling at.
Yeah, the price. Coming in at under half of the price of the Womanizer, you can do the math.
You’ll like this product if you’re finding that your vibrating clitoral toys just aren’t working for you anymore. I’d recommend taking a week or two off of ALL clitoral vibes and then trying out the Satisfyer. In my experiences, my body just needed a little time away from the buzzies to learn how to react to the different stimulation of the Satisfyer. You’ll also love this toy if you’re looking for quick orgasms on the fly. I daresay that it’s quiet enough to use discreetly in public if that’s your jam.
Satisfyer has several other products in their lineup that are awaiting release. I’m very excited to see what else this company can bring to the bedroom in the months to come!